Last week I was shopping for Xmas gifts for friends and family and was approached by a young foreign woman selling manicure kits. After asking for a second of my time, she took me by the thumb and began to polish it with some magic rectangle that made my nail very shiny, all while talking to me about the fantastic deal she was going to give me on these perfect holiday gifts.

I’m not a sucker. I don’t waste money on overpriced novelties or fall for fraudulent salespeople’s tactics. I walked up to her with that attitude. I figured I would humor her. Let her talk, go along with her crap while being a loud and obnoxious douche bag to make her stand look like a joke and make her feel like an idiot for asking a young, financially struggling college student to buy her expensive crap. I was not, under any circumstances, going to buy a manicure kit.

I left with two.

The fact that she was very attractive is what made me give her a chance. The fact that she had a hot foreign accent made me stay. And the fact that she didn’t mind me staring at her awesome cleavage while she rattled on about some insignificant crap involving my cuticles made me buy. She was so hot, and I am such an idiot. A broke idiot. All because this hot foreigner let me stare at her boobies.

Anyway, no updates this week.  See you guys tomorrow!