Some of our regular readers may have noticed that I was gone most of last week, and in my absence our dedicated editor Casual Clayton “Joel the Jokester” Cunningham took over the site. Surprisingly to me, he was very humble about taking on these new responsibilities.

Anyway, regardless of how much everyone on the internet loves good ol’ Clay, I’m back in command. Don’t go running off on me, I’ll try to be as effective as Clay by making sure an astounding one review gets posted each week, unless he decides to intervene by writing a review of No More Heroes 2 while enjoying himself in Nashville, Tennessee like I had to do because productivity wasn’t staying optimal.

Regardless, things should be getting back to normal now.

Things are a bit hectic this week at Everyview HQ, as site creator/head writer/bastard who steals my ideas then quadruples my rate of success Zac Pritcher is vacationing in Memphis, Tennessee, walking with his feet ten feet off of Beale (anyone who gets this joke has made a friend in me for life).

While he’s gone, he has decided to pass on all the major editorship duties he usually handles, starting with the posting of this little weekly schpeal where we pretend to be delusional enough to believe we actually have readers, to me, Casual Clay Cunningham.

That said, I honestly don’t know exactly what is in store this week. Andrew Majors recently reviewed an EP by Tristan Clopet which I will post tomorrow. I myself may do an untimely and unnecessary review of an 11-year-old My Morning Jacket album, I haven’t yet decided.

Before we get into anything major, I feel the need to apologize in advance if the quality of work this week is a bit on the substandard side. Keep in mind I have never, nor have I ever desired to, run a website before, so I could prove to be in over my head. But no matter how bad it gets, everyone’s favorite manipulative bastard (who likely regrets letting me write this) will be back in a weeks time. Thanks, and please don’t give up on us based on this week.

Clay

Before we let you know what reviews we’ve currently got under way, we would like to apologize for the recent lack of posts. We’ve all been really busy and really broke. Really, really broke. But hopefully things will start to pick back up soon, as we’ve got a brand new writer joining the team this week. We’ll leave the introduction up to him, but hopefully he’ll bring a lot to the site.

Anyway, here are some of the reviews currently in the works:

• Product review for Nuclear Energy
• Black Dynamite Movie Review
• No More Heroes 2 Wii Review
• Smackdown VS Raw 2010 Wii Review
• Microsoft Zune HD Tech Review
• HTC Hero for Sprint Tech Review
• Wheaties Fuel Food Review
• Vuka Workout Energy Drink Review

Happy Valentine’s day, love birds! And to all you lonely, single people out there who have nothing better to do than cut yourselves while eating a tub of off brand “frozen dairy dessert,” Clay feels your pain.

Anyway, here’s a list of what we’ve got currently got in development. A little something to look forward to.

Zac

• BioShock 2 (DoubleShot with Brandon)
• Vuka: Workout Energy Drink
• All three flavors of Nuclear Energy Powder
• No More Heroes 2: Desperate Struggle

Clay

• Brief Interviews with Hideous Men

John

• An iPhone game called Trenches

Brandon

• BioShock 2 (DoubleShot with Zac)
• Battlefield: Bad Company

Here is a look at what reviews we’ve got planned for your reading pleasure this week.

Zac

• Vuka: Think (Energy Drink)
• Vuka: Workout (Energy Drink)
• Vuka: Renew (Energy Drink)
• BioShock 2 (DoubleShot with Brandon)

Clay

• Kroger Boneless, Skinless Chicken Thighs
• Some movie called A Serious Man

Andrew

• Pheonix’s album entitled “Wolfgang Amadeus Pheonix”

Pat

• The iPhone FPS N.O.V.A.

Brandon

• Wolfman
• BioShock 2 (DoubleShot with Zac)

Happy February! Love is in the air and condom sales are skyrocketing this month thanks to Valentine’s day being right around the corner. Unfortunately not enough condoms are being sold, because I have a feeling teen abortion rates are going to jump by about 20% in March.

Anyway, here’s a look at some of the articles we have planned for this week.

Zac

• Easy-Bake Oven
• The complete lineup of Vuka Energy Drinks
• Weaties Fuel
• No More Heroes 2: Desperate Struggle (Wii)

Andrew:

• Other Lives Self-titled album
• Pheonix’s latest effort
• “Swoon” by Silversun Pickups
• Ep. 1 of the Last Season of Lost

Brandon:

• Mass Effect 2 (Xbox 360)