I took some Spanish in high school, a fact that might lead you to think that I know something about the language, but don’t be fooled. I only know the very basics. I can count to ten, ask where the bathroom is, get in trouble for sexual harassment,  order a cheeseburger and french fries, insult a fat dog’s Grandmother, and ask for a swine flu vaccine.

You can try to argue with me and tell me that is useless knowledge, but as far as I’m concerned there’s nothing else you need to know when visiting Mexico.

At least that’s what I thought until I got my hands on a bag of the (deep breath) Sabor a Chile y Limon flavor of Pepe’s El Original Duros de Harina Puffed Wheat Snacks. Trust me on this, these things are mucho delicious.

El Review:

You may be asking yourself “What the infierno are these things?” Es muy awesome as hell, is what they are. Every little square is packed full of so much flavor that it is unbelievable how satisfying and addictive something as simple as puffed squares of wheat can be.

There is a fantastic amount of heat in each crisp. In, fact it is almost overwhelming at first. A few seconds pass and the sweet, salty lime comes and eases the pain from the chili to create a wonderful, savory balance that simply hits the spot. And these little chicos are covered in an abundant amount of seasoning as well, ensuring each puff is absolutely scrumptious and not bland or underseasoned, a big problem with a lot of Americano snacks. Pepe’s got our back when it comes to flavor, there’s no question about that.

The only real problem with Pepe’s Puffed Wheat Snacks is that… well, they’re Puffed Wheat Snacks. This means that no matter how well they are flavored, every single crispy little chip feels like baked Styrofoam in your mouth until your saliva is able to turn the dry crisp into an equally unappealing bit of gritty mush in your mouth. Anyone who has ever eaten Puffcorn or any other packing peanut style snack knows what I’m talking about.

Now you’re probably wondering “How am I supposed to get my hands on these delicious snacks? I can’t just go to Mexico!” Worry not, good Americans, as crossing the border is not required to satisfy your deprived taste buds. Simply head on down to your nearest Big Lots to snag a bag for a mere 80¢ and let the snacking begin!

El Final Words:

I’m no Mexico major. I live in America. Why should I need to learn another language when everyone in the whole world already speaks English? Heck, I’ve spoken more Spanish in this review than ever do at authentic Mexican restaurants like Taco Bell. However, every word on this bag is worth knowing, not matter what language you speak. You never want to be stuck in a Third World Country like Mexico without being able to garner yourself at least this one luxury.

El Pros

• Very well-seasoned
• Fantastic balance between chili and lime

El Cons

• Puffed Wheat
• H1N1

El Score: 8.25/10 (Mucho Bueno)