If you’re like me, you have things. They’re pretty great, but they take up space. Things like chairs, books, clothes hangers and pet birds. When things are just sitting around in the way, it gets pretty hard managing your living space. Well, luckily scientists just released a breakthrough in storage technology. It’s big, it’s brown, and it’s cube-shaped. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you a new era in “putting things in other things,” The Cardboard Box.
Now, I know what you’re saying to yourself. “Thomas, I don’t fully understand the message you’re trying to convey to me. That thing’s huge, how is it going to make MORE space?” Well, reader, I’ve got a little secret for you:
The box is hollow.
That’s it. That’s what makes this product SO buyable. You can put other things in it, which creates the illusion of there being no stuff at all. Just a box. It’s like you have Criss freaking Angel in your living room/bedroom/Parents’ basement calling all the shots! Using his magics on all your stuff!
Cardboard Box not only contains things, but you can fold it right up into a flat square, and it turns into a dance floor! It also has a water-activated color-changing technology built in. When your cardboard gets wet, it goes from a smooth and light beige to a dark, classy deep brown. The best part? Cardboard Box works with the duct tape you have at home, making it infinitely resealable for optimal usability.
Score: 9.0/10 (Probably the greatest thing to happen to the storage world.)
Brownness: 10/10 (TWO shades of brown in one, depending on the amount of water present.)
Cardboardness: 10/10 (Made of SOLID cardboard.)
Entertainment Value: 7.0/10 (Could be slightly more exciting. Number of break dancers in the vicinity can potentially bump this score up to an 8.5)
I love the color-changing concept the incorporated into the design. And the fact that i creates the illusion of nothingness is amzing! like it puts your items in another dimension!
Closing these things is a disaster. I mean, four flaps. Am I supposed to just fold them one over the next, where there is no full closure, or do some sort of wizardry where the first one actually ends up UNDER the last one?
Scientists are still working out the finer details of “Cardboard Box,” but hopefully by early 2010 the box interface will be perfected so that anyone can use “Cardboard Box.”
I was expecting this to b funny.
And we were expecting your comment to not be illiterate. You can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometime, you might find, you get Cardboard Box. Which could, potentially, be filled with what you want.
In your case, an education would be perfect. You should want that.
You should also want Cardboard Box.
Wow, ye i heard there was a 2nd generation coming out which comes with duct-tape! For sticking the flaps down apparently.. I don’t know, it just confuses me :S
I am really disappointed in this article. A good writer does his research and you obviously didn’t. I hadn’t heard of this amazing thing and had been using garbage bags. I do appreciate the knowledge tho. Next time at minimum google the thing you are going to review ok? They make self sealable cardboard boxes and alot of them are pretty nifty! You did your readers a disservice today, Thomas. I’m just saying.
Keep up the good work, just put a bit more effort in it next time.
And like you said there but not expressed that there are so many uses than just storage; use it for a dog kennel or baby crib, level out a table or desk, patch some dry wall, startt a fire( very flammable), make homeless signs(very profitable), and you can even give it to your pet hamsters so they can make a bed…. just like a hobo!!!!
Self-sealing cardboard boxes! I call black magic.
It has been rumoured that the army is working with new cardboard box technology in hopes that U.S special forces may actually use the box as a cloak of sorts, encasing themselves in it and using the open end for there feet, so that they may appear to be a fully closed box, but move into position for battle while the enemy turns away.
Don’t forget it makes an awesome hat!